Posted in battle of yourself, Beauty standards, flawed, gangnam beauty, loveyourself, scars

Review ,Drama series : My ID Gangnam Beauty.

Hey , gorgeous , it’s been such a long time , ugh i have been so packed up with my schedule and now i just wanna talk a lot about beauty , LMAO it’s not like i’m a beauty expert but yeah let me be.

so , this last couple of months i have been introduced to this k-dramas named “My ID Gangnam Beauty” yes it’s a korean drama , it’s a story about a girl named Kang Mirae who was insecure with her physical features , ok i know everyone has their own insecurities and i personally think it’s normal , we are all humans afterall , we tend to crave perfections and we always think that we are not enough , we always want something more , and our society always demand something more for us.

growing up as a girl , become beautiful is something that i want to accomplished , but now i realized being a girl is more than just beautiful , we are more than that , we are strong , we are smart , we are stubborn , and that’s what makes us girls , females , ladies , well you named it , but my focus today isn’t this but how the story in this drama relates so much with the majority of girls in this world , the insecurities , the wars between girls in throwing shade and how competitive we are , how we are drawn to those pretty boys , , and how our society makes us feel insecure and that we are never enough to the point surgery is the answer , that makes me realize how fucked up we are as a human being , i have nothing against those who has done so many surgeries , i’m no one to judge , it’s really not about the surgery , the labels , and the natural beauty , it’s all really just how we think of our selves , how we should not let those insults get into our heads and turn us into someone that is intoxicated with the thought of beauty .

in this drama there are 2 main characters , that caught my attentions , both are girls , both are pretty , both aren’t able to love themselves , the different is just the way they express it , okay let’s call them Mirae and Soo A .

Mirae wasn’t really blessed with the ‘natural beauty‘ she did a lot of surgery on her face just to feel confident and pretty , and she is labelled as Gangnam Beauty , it’s a name for those people who does a lot of surgeries and look so unreal , she cares a lot of what people think of her self , to the point even when she has done a lot of surgeries she still feels insecure and being hard on her self , she feels that she isn’t worth the love of this hot guy named Kyungseok and see her self as someone who doesn’t worth his time and that she doesn’t deserve him , all because she feels she isn’t pretty enough for him , but actually Kyungseok doesn’t really cares , he sees through her self , he sees the real her , he doesn’t care about her past , he doesn’t care about her face , he cares because she is Kang Mirae and that’s what makes him in love with her , she is just being herself .

as for Soo A she was born to be pretty , everyone knows that and she knows that , but knowing her self being pretty isn’t enough for her , she still has so many insecurities to the point she wants to be loved by everyone , literally the whole campus admire her , because she is a cutie and lovely , but no one ever see her true color , she can’t bare the thought that other girls have something that she is not , get me? like she wants to be the number one in everyone hearts but life doesn’t work that way , and the fact that Kyungseok hates her and chose Mirae than her instead , makes her mad , makes her questioning herself , how can someone who was blessed with natural beauty lost a battle to someone who wasn’t even pretty from the beginning and do a lot of surgeries , at least that’s what she thought .

but really it’s really not the looks , not a gift , it’s all about self love , how can we love someone if we can’t even love ourselves ? if we always see the bad inside us how can we see the good in others?

if we keep give a damn about what others says , we won’t find our comfort and our happiness , we can give a lot of surgeries on ourselves to be ‘pretty’ the way we see what pretty is , but really if deep down we see ourselves as someone ugly than those surgeries mean nothing at all .

you can do whatever you want with your face , body just to feel like a queen , but if you do it to satisfy our society , to satisfy those people who labels you , you better stop , or happiness won’t find you .

this drama really gives such a strong messages to many young girls out there , that you have always been beautiful , it’s just the matter of time when you can see the real you , when you can see the potential with in you .

loving ourselves isn’t easy , it’s hard , but it’s not impossible.

Posted in battle of yourself, bullied, bullying, cyberbullies, flawed, hatred, loveyourself, monster, scars

Circle Of Hatred ( Bullied and Bullies)

Hi! it’s been such a long time since i’ve been inactive on my blog but now i’m back from my long thought about what should i post , lol so now i know what i wanna post , i feel like i have to get it out of my chest , just so i can feel better .

Insecurities maybe that’s the right word to describe how i felt back then , i’ve seen so many stories about how people being bullied or being the bullies them selves , well mostly people put them selves as the victim , but in my case i’m both , yep you read it right , i was bullied and i was also the bullies , to call me as the devil incarnate back then was understandable , but i’d rather called my old self as cowards or problematic .

but why? you who’ve been bullied must be wondering , why are we bullies being mean to you? what have you possibly done wrong that makes us despise you so much? because i did .

Back when i was bullied i was just 9 years old , kids in my class beat the shit out of me because i was too stand out , i was born different , i was born with a birthmark on my right cheek a big and red one , at first they would just gave me stares , glares , and things escalated quickly to the point they started to call me names , i could take that even tho i cried my eyes out every night but i took those insults pretty well , until one day a boy named Ferry step on my head , literally step on my head , i’m not exaggerating , i couldn’t take that anymore , i felt upset , i hated my self , i wanted to kill my self , i’m not asking for your pity but yeah a 9 years old little girl had a suicidal thought and had so much hatred towards her self for being born to this filthy world .

Don’t come right at me saying “where is your mom? how could she being oblivious?” i told her everything , and yeah she was mad , upset , knowing her little girl that she gave birth to can’t easily blend in to the society , i believe every parents would have been mad , but telling her everything and having her confronted that asshole named Ferry wasn’t enough for me , wasn’t enough to heal my wounds , not for many years at least .

*don’t get me wrong she still is the best and i love her so much , i couldn’t asked for a better mom , she is already the best*

The thing that i wanna say is the wounds took time to heal , and it killed my character for a quiet long time , and not to mentioned the thoughts of me being not enough in everything gave me a hard time to figuring out what i wanna do with my life , they don’t just kill my self esteem , they also put so many hatred inside me , so as times flies , i grew up became a troubled teenager .

Back in middle school i had a friend named AT , i’m going to keep her identity hidden okay , i met her the first time was when i bumped to her on my way to the cafetaria and she was just like me , had no self esteem , people keep calling her freak , and always is stutter , and no i wasn’t a kind teenager , i was as mean as a regina george can be just maybe Regina George is a sexy bastard and i wasn’t , i was a complete monster inside out , just seeing her being weak made my blood boiled because she reminded me of my old self , and i had no idea what kind of demons that possesed my self , but what i had in mind was to make her life even more miserable than she already is , the amount of hatred i had to my old self can’t be describe with words or even count with numbers , to the point that i hated her , i hated her for reminding me to my oldself , as if i beat the shit out of my old self , i did everything i could to make people hated her even more and humiliated her in front of everyone , i know how could i do that ? i knew exactly the pain , the struggles ,why did i do that to her ? every sane people has asked me the same questions , what’s wrong with me? why was i being so violent and ruthless? what makes me so different then with those bullies? I WAS WORSE , that’s what makes me so different , and i wasn’t proud of my self either , trust me after all the things i did to her i hated my self even more , i shouldn’t done that , but i couldn’t help it , all i think about was i didn’t want to be loved i wanted to be feared, i didn’t want to be the loser anymore , i didn’t want to get hurt anymore , so i positioned my self as those bullies that way i wouldn’t get hurt anymore , i wouldn’t get beaten , molested , etc , and that’s exactly why i did that .

why am i telling you this? why am i writing these?

i see that a lot of people these days aren’t aware that what they did , what they said , what they wrote on social media , on someone’s locker in school , the hatred , you know especially that now there is this thing called Cyber bullies , i believe that’s even more fucked up , how words can kill someone , can affect someone that much , i know that it’s funny to hear this from someone like me , from someone who has put others in pain just so i could felt better , it’s like you hear Donald Trump saying how he respect other cultures and races , not credible and sounds so hypocrite .

but believe me i was bullied and it turned me out into someone who has a fuck up personalities , bad temper and i didn’t even knew which is better being a monster i had became back then or just killed  my self from what they did , so stop before it’s too late , stop before you actually kill someone , stop before you actually created a monster from your behavior .

dear bullies , i believe there is still kindness inside you , i believe you are just in so much pain , i believe you are just weaker than the ones that you picked on everyday , because they simply made you feel better but i believe you don’t want to create another broken human being just because of you right? you don’t want to summon the monster and evil from someone to the point that they could be worse than you , think before you act , you aren’t the only one who has problems , you have problems and i believe you don’t wanna be the problem of someone mentally dying and broken , stop this circle , a circle of hatred that lead others to be a monster.

i believe everyone was born kind , bad people are just hurted , broken , and betrayed , as for AT i thank God she is now has grown to be such a beautiful girl and puberty hit her like a truck , i’m thankful that she didn’t ended up like me being a monster , she handled it better than i do.

as for those whose being bullied don’t give up , this is your own battle , don’t let those monster win , just know that they are far from strong , and they have no right to tell you who you are , stand up for yourself , you are worth it , you are beautiful , don’t let a monster plant a hatred inside you that they ruined your kindness , have a courage , you are a human being you deserve to be loved no matter what!

and lastly , forgive them , they may made your life in hell but you are better than them .





Posted in Beauty standards, feature, jenbeautycare, loveyourself, skincare

Love Yourself Rose Water Solusi Tepat Bagi Kulit Berharga mu.

baca juga :

Love Yourself RoseWater By JenBeauty Care , Honest Review and Opinion.

Press Release : ‘Love Yourself Rose Water ‘ produk baru dari JenBeauty Care34509899_250784739002897_1145534491570208768_o

Kulit Sehat Dengan Love Yourself Rose Water .

Memiliki kulit yang sehat adalah kunci kulit yang lembut dan cantik , sebagai wanita merawat diri sudah merupakan sebuah keharusan , bukan hanya untuk sekedar menarik perhatian lawan jenis tapi juga demi kepentingan diri sendiri dan melakukan perawatan untuk kulit juga tidak ada ruginya , melainkan akan menghasilkan kulit yang sehat dan indah .

Semua kembali kepada diri sendiri , tidak ada yang tidak mungkin jika ingin mencoba , sama halnya dengan merawat kulit , tidak ada waktu bukanlah alasan jika benar – benar peduli dengan kesehatan kulit , sesuatu yang baik hanya bisa didapat dengan usaha yang maksimal , begitu juga dengan kulit sudah diberikan beragam jenis pilihan perawatan kulit , hanya tinggal memilih mana yang terbaik bagi kulit kita , kenali kulit mu dan rawatlah dengan sepenuh hati.

Kulit yang sehat merupakan asset dimasa tua kelak , namun melihat maraknya perawatan kulit yang serba mahal , banyak orang yang akhirnya mengurungkan niatnya untuk merawat kulit , sehingga mengabaikan betapa pentingnya skincare untuk keremajaan kulit mereka , hadirnya Love Yourself Rosewater dengan kemasan yang lucu dan simple memberikan solusi bagi kaum hawa untuk kembali merawat diri lebih maksimal tanpa harus khawatir dengan isi dompet .

Selain wanginya yang harum dan masih kental wangi bunga mawar , produk ini dikemas dalam botol yang cantik dan simple , sangat menarik perhatian banyak kaum hawa , terlepas dari pada itu Love Yourself Rose Water menjawab dan memberikan solusi yang tepat dalam 1 botol kemasan Rose Water , mempercantik dan merawat diri bukan lagi hal yang menjadi masalah besar bagi kaum hawa .

Satu untuk semua , mungkin itu adalah kalimat yang tepat untuk mendefinisikan Love Yourself Rose Water , dengan 98% bunga mawar asli , rose water ini sudah menjawab berbagai macam keluhan kulit bagi kaum hawa , terutama bagi mereka yang hidup dikota besar seperti Jakarta yang 70% waktunya dihabiskan untuk bekerja Love Yourself Rose Water merupakan hadiah dari surga untuk kulit berharga mereka yang hidup dikota besar seperti Jakarta , dengan begitu banyak manfaat yang dihasilkan untuk kulit , seperti mencerahkan , mengurangi jerawat , mengontrol kulit berminyak dan menyeimbangkan PH kulit , dan itu semua bisa didapatkan dari 1 botol kemasan Love Yourself Rose Water .

Memilih skincare yang tepat terbilang cukup susah , melihat berbagai macam jenis kulit yang ada mulai dari berminyak , kering , dan kombinasi sebagai kaum hawa memastikan skincare yang dipilih harus berdasarkan dengan jenis kulit yang dimiliki , maka itu Love Yourself Rosewater memberikan jawaban tepat karena bisa masuk ke beragam jenis kulit.

Posted in Beauty standards, jenbeautycare, loveyourself, personal opinion, skincare

Love Yourself RoseWater By JenBeauty Care , Honest Review and Opinion.

Kecantikan sudah menjadi sebuah gaya hidup kebanyakan wanita jaman kini , apapun akan dilakukan demi merawat diri , mulai dari perawatan kulit sampai make-up , namun kali ini saya akan berbicara tentang skincare , karena makeup saja tidak cukup untuk mempercantik diri , betul girls?

Mendapatkan skincare praktis , dan serba guna dalam 1 tempat pasti menjadi impian banyak wanita dan mungkin juga pria , karena pada dasarnya merawat diri tidak mengenal jenis kelamin , skincare merupakan bagian dari merawat diri , dan juga sangatlah penting bagi kesehatan tubuh , kali ini saya ingin memberikan opini saya mengenai Love Yourself Rose Water produk terbaru dari JenBeauty Care .

Saya yakin beberapa dari kalian pasti sudah familiar dengan Rose Water , yang sangat marak digunakan untuk setting spray , toner , cleansing , moisturizer , tidak berbeda dari rose water pada umumnya , hanya kemasannya yang berbeda , dan lebih praktis dan sudah pasti packagingnya yang super pretty and simple ini sudah menyita banyak perhatian kaum hawa loh.

Saya pun sudah kepincut dengan packagingnya yang super pretty and simple ini , selain pacakgingnya yang pretty and simple , wanginya juga masih naturally rose banget , jadi bisa dijamin Love Yourself Rose Water ini sangat organic dan pas buat berbagai jenis kulit .

Love Yourself Rose Water ini saya pakai sebagai Toner  untuk menyegarkan kulit dan mata agar tidak terlihat sayu , penggunaan toner ini akan lebih segar jika disimpan didalam kulkas , dituang kekapas , letakkan kapas yang sudah dibauri rosewater itu dibawah mata dan tunggu selama 1 sampai 2 menit hingga kapas kering lalu angkat .

Selain toner , surprisingly rose water ini bener – bener serba guna , guess the Marketing ain’t lying girls ,  selain aku jadiin toner , rose water ini juga bisa membantu mengurangi jerawat jika dicampur dengan perasan air lemon , dan jika dicampur dengan madu rosewater ini bisa menyerahkan kulit wajah , memang prosesnya tidak secepat pencerah kulit pada umumnya tapi mengetahui rosewater ini bisa dicampur berbagai macam dan memberikan manfaat yang beragam untuk kulit wajah , this product definitely worth to buy !!

Selain banyak manfaat , cara penggunaannya juga sumper simple and easy , jadi I don’t see another reason to not buy this product tho , tapi ini hanya pendapat saya yang sudah menggunakan produk ini , menurut saya produk ini worth to buy.

baca juga : Love Yourself Rose Water Solusi Tepat Bagi Kulit Berharga mu.

Press Release : ‘Love Yourself Rose Water ‘ produk baru dari JenBeauty Care

Posted in Beauty standards, flawed, jenbeautycare, loveyourself, press release, skincare

Press Release : ‘Love Yourself Rose Water ‘ produk baru dari JenBeauty Care

Tepatnya pada hari Rabu , 23 Mei  2018 , JenBeauty Care.Tbk telah melaunching produk terbarunya yang merupakan Rose Water bernamakan Love Yourself Rose Water , besarnya antusias konsumen akan merawat kulit wajah  menginspirasi JenBeauty Care untuk akhirnya memutuskan untuk membuat dan meluncurkan produk terbarunya yang serbaguna dan praktis ini .

Harga yang ditawarkan pun tergolong ramah dompet , sangat cocok bagi kawula muda yang ingin merawat diri tanpa mengeluarkan uang banyak , mulai dari Rp30.000,00 sampai Rp50.000,00 sudah bisa mendapatkan Love Yourself Rose Water ini , dengan harga yang terbilang murah ini Love Yourself Rose Water juga memiliki banyak manfaat untuk kulit kita .

Manfaat yang diberikan dari Love Yourself Rose Water produk terbaru buatan JenBeauty Care membantu menghilangkan jerawat , mencerahkan kulit , mengurangi minyak diwajah , menghilangkan mata panda , dan produk ini juga membantu meremajakan kulit sehingga terhindar dari penuaan dini.

Team JenBeauty Care berharap produk dengan konsep Love Yourself ini bisa membantu konsumen untuk lebih menghargai dan merawat diri sendiri , diluncurkannya produk ini selain memenuhi keinginan konsumen akan skincare yang praktis dan serba guna juga untuk mengingatkan bahwa dengan menggunakan produk kami bisa meningkatkan percaya diri konsumen dan lebih mencintai dirinya sendiri dengan merawat kulit yang merupakan hal paling berharga dari dirinya yang membutuhkan perhatian extra .

Love Yourself Rose Water ini bisa didapatkan melalui website official kami , dan di E-Commerce lainnya , dan di store JenBeauty Care terdekat.


Posted in battle of yourself, educationsystem, hardiknas, nationaleducationday, personal opinion

National Education Day.

National Education Day , is our education system has formed our kids to be an individual who knows what they really want to do in life? or they just formed us to think the way they want us to think?

how many kids specifically in Indonesia knows what they want to do in their life ? how many potential brain and skill has gone wasted because of the system that trapped the free soul of our future? i personally think there is something wrong in our education system , no offense because for 20 years i’ve lived as a social creatures i’ve seen how my friends in general don’t know what they wanna do once they get out of college .

honestly i’ve been asking my self lately , what is the purpose of education is exist other than just to make our kids to be smart ? but what is the right definition of smart that our education system trying to form ? is it that kind of smart that you have to be a straight A’s kid , to be an expert at science ?

i’m not trying to be salty about those who are great at science and math do your thing , but what i’m trying to say is that the bitter truth of our generation not knowing what they want to do in their life and if they don’t even know what they want to do in life , how do you expect them to be responsible of our future? of our country ? has our education system fail us?

i’m not saying that we have failed , that our education system fail us , no , but reality check people , how many of your friends who are in college and still don’t know what they are doing? the world has changed , shouldn’t our education system be aware of it too? and stop messing around with our brains ?

remember how many high school students are crying over how the math national examination was giving them a hard time? they have learn so hard , they study day and night , non stop and expecting to be able to answer all of the questions but no our government just have to mess with them and make their brain as an experiment , that is not okay , what do you think you are doing ? crushing their dream by make them as an experiment ? what is this? your mad science lab?

they expect us to be responsible of our country , of our future , yet they are the one who make us lost , lost to the battle of our selves trying to figure out what we really want.


Posted in Beauty standards, beautyisawound, flawed, mature content

Beauty Is A Wound by Eka Kurniawan

Beauty is something that everyone especially girls would take extra care of these days , something that people, would be proud of if they being called as “such a beauty”  , even people are fighting and trying so hard to reach it .

Speaking about how beauty is being praised by our society and has been formed in so many ways in different country and perspective , beauty could also become something really painful even some take it as a curse , here is the story of Dewi Ayu from Halimunda the main character of Beauty Is A Wound By Eka Kurniawan .

This story tell you so many facts about how being beautiful or pretty is a cursed , about how Dewi Ayu was forced to be a prostitute at the age of 16 to satisfied the needs of Japanese soldier back in the colonial era and ended up being pregnant by one of the soldier , Dewi Ayu is a half Dutch half Indonesian , just like every mixed girl at that time she was counted as pretty , big eyes , porcelain skin , pointed small nose , she basically classified by the beauty standard  .

As I said before Dewi Ayu was forced to be a prostitute by the age 16 and still is the most beautiful prostitute in Halimunda even when she’s in her late 30’s and already has 3 beautiful daughters and 1 hideous daughter named Beauty by the time she was 50 as she wished for it when she found out she was pregnant for the 4th times she was bored of having a beautiful daughter so she asked for the hideous one and buried her self alive.

You must be wondering or even feel pity of Dewi Ayu for what happened to her youth being assaulted and forced to pleased the Japanese soldier , but the fact that Dewi Ayu actually enjoyed it so much being a prostitute would blow your mind away , the fact that she wants her daughter Maya Dewi the 3rd daughter to marry a guy whose desperately in love with Dewi Ayu was giving me a hard time to swallow how insane Dewi Ayu actually is ,and her reason of doing that was because she doesn’t want Maya to follow her older sisters steps Alamanda and Adinda to keep breaking guys heart .

Well long story short the 3 daughters of Dewi Ayu ended up marrying 3 important man in Halimunda , they are Maman Gendeng a revolutionary turned thug , Shodancho the regional military commander , and Kliwon the communist , to say that their love story is complicated and pretty awkward was understandable , how Kliwon and Alamanda was in love and Shodancho was in love with Alamanda and ended up raping her and making her his wife was pretty wild for my liking and how at the end Kliwon ended up with Adinda and marrying and how Dewi Ayu let her 3rd daughter to marry Maman Gendeng at the age of 12 so none of Alamanda’s eventful story would ever happen to Maya Dewi was such a bad mom’s move , even though Maya was fine with it , still reality check marrying underage kids to an old man specifically a thug is illegal now isn’t it?

After all of her 3 daughters are married , grew up and having kids , Dewi Ayu got pregnant again and this time is different because her last child isn’t as gorgeous as her previous kids , she was bored of having a beautiful and gorgeous kids in her arms and life , so she asked a Goddess to make her last kid to be hideous and so her cursed in her whole family would be off , yes her whole family was cursed of having such a problematic life and one by one her daughters ended up as a widow since their husbands are death and killed one by one in a tragic way .

How could they be cursed? Back when Dewi Ayu was still in her glorious era and stage of life , her grand father torn a couple apart by raping , so her grand father was a dutch man , as you might know that Indonesia was known to be slaved by the dutch back in the colonial era , so of course her grand father was the man who had the power , and so he took a local girl to be raped and let her lover grieving and crying all night long knowing that his lover was raped , and long story short the love birds died , the girl killed her self by jumped off the cliff and a  few years later her lover did the exact same thing , my guess is that the lovers who killed them selves was hurt terribly , of course , and cursed the dutch man and his whole family to be miserable and alone , just how he did to the poor guy .

That is why this book was called as Beauty is a wound because clearly , the beauty doesn’t help the life of these beauty.